213 downstairs

Gonna have meatballs,
Right after making shitballs.
How…"circle of life."

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212 downstairs

So far no Covid,
But my ass doesn't sound good.
Hang in there, my butt.

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211 downstairs

I sat for so long
I think my balls fell asleep.
*Flick* Ouch! No, they're fine.

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210 downstairs

Sorry, cleaning crew.
The upcoming toilet work
Just got more grueling.

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209 downstairs

I can't explain it,
But this particular shit
Seems angry with me.

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208 home

I'm glad I'm alone.
I mean at home. I suppose
In the bathroom too.

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207 downstairs

Did I poop my pants?
No. Did I consider it?
Well, technically yes.

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206 home

A triple flusher
And each one was touch and go
Except no touching.

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205 downstairs

I farted enough
That my wife said "Jesus Christ."
She thinks I'm godlike.

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204 home

Oof - this came on quick.
Lied to people on a call
To get here in time.

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203 downstairs

Maybe my body
Can't handle things like hot dogs
In my advanced age.

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202 downstairs

Glad I got that out.
I doubt the coliseum
Has decent bathrooms.

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201 home

How can a hole hurt?
Good question. May I present
Exhibit A…nus.

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200 home

Knew I wasn't done,
But I didn't think I'd be
All like "dun dun DUN!"

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199 downstairs

Happy Friday, folks!
Today, I'm celebrating
With mushy smellies.

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198 home!

The Boston food said
"Get me out of this guy, stat!"
And my butt complied.

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197 Boston hotel

I know there's more, and
I leave early tomorrow.
Airport shit? Hope not.

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196 Boston hotel

Meeting stood me up.
That's fine because I had time
To run up and dump.

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195 Boston hotel

My blackened salmon
Somehow became browned during
Its intestine run.

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194 Boston hotel

Day one in Boston,
Dump one is Boston. I smell
A pattern! And shit.

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193 downstairs

(Yesterday)
Going to Boston
But will avoid the baked beans
For valid reasons.

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192 kids’ bathroom

A five minute break,
And I'm making the most of-
Shit. Gonna be late.

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191 downstairs

(Yesterday)
My ass is tired.
I actually mean "my ass"
And not "all of me."

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190 downstairs

Did the green salsa
Cause this madness and also
Turn brown on the way?

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189 home

Though gross, that felt good.
In a "this had to happen"
Version of goodness.

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188 downstairs

I just went a lot.
Maybe Friday's burrito
Was a component.

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187 kids’ bathroom

Happy birthday, Mom!
I made you something, but the
I forgot and flushed.

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