234 home

Tried some new hot sauce,
And I'm guessing this grossness
Points right back to that.

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233 downstairs

I slept horribly,
So my eyes were closing while
My asshole opened.

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232 home

Ugh. Another one
And I don't think I'm done yet.
Gird your nose holes, folks.

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231 downstairs

Should be a chill day.
From now on at least. This is
A minor struggle.

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230 downstairs

Yesterday

Number 230!
More like number Butt Hurty.
Just pretend that works.

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229 downstairs

Another gross one.
The upcoming election
Isn't helping things.

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228 home

Fun fact: since I've aged,
My stomach started hating
Greasy cheese pizza.

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227 downstairs

Even though I stopped,
Don't fret; I'll be back. I have
So much more to give.

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226 downstairs

Glad I'm doing this
Before my massage later.
Better than during.


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225 home

Happy Thursday, folks!
I have a peace offering:
It's a piece of shit.

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224 home

I tried twice before
But had no luck. Or maybe
I had all the luck.

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223 home

Another shit show.
Well, not an actual show.
Just a mono-log.

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222 downstairs

Number 2-2-2
Was too much, too loosely-formed,
And too disgusting.

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221 home

Broke the fast last night.
Broke my anus this morning.
(The toilet still works.)

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220 home

Advil is working,
And I think it somehow made
My butt relaxed too.

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219 downstairs

Ya know what's not fun?
Shitting when your back is out.
Wiping's even worse.

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218 home

If liquid shit was
Was spelled "likwyd shyt" instead,
Would it be as gross?

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217 downstairs

That greasy pizza
Did a number on my ass.
I'll remember that.

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216 downstairs

Meetings all day long.
So if I didn't go now,
I'd be full of shit.

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215 downstairs

I leaned forward and -
Poof! - I magically made the
Clean air disappear.

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214 downstairs

Yesterday

A post swimming shit.
First I'm in the pool, and then
The kids take a dip.

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213 home

I haven't looked yet,
But if my mind's butt is right,
That was two feet long.

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212 downstairs

This is a bad sign.
I just finished Taco Bell
And already here.

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211 work

First one here. Thank god.
That allows me to deny
That this stink was mine.

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210 downstairs

Yesterday

Wrong holiday, but
If I only had one shit
Today, dayeinu.

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209 downstairs

Yesterday
It's Rosh Hashanah!
Fifty-seven eighty-five!
First New Jew Year Poo.

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