282 home

Not to be gross but
Shitting out chicken shawarma -
Ya know, I'll stop there.

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281 downstairs

Sometimes I feel like
A human lava lamp, but
With poop. And no lamp.

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280 work

Was feeling bloated,
But after that mound of shit,
Nope - still feel bloated.

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279 downstairs

Do shit particles
Show up on an MRI?
What if I missed some?

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278 downstairs

I'm afraid to look.
Unpleasant on the way out
And smells like, well, shit.

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277 downstairs

Two school drop-offs and
One dog to the vet between
These dumping sessions.

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276 downstairs

Is it the steroids
That made this shit…bulkier?
My butt's curious.

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275 home

Need an MRI,
Which I'm told does not stand for
My Rectum Itches.

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274 home

My back is still jacked,
In the fucked up way and not
The yoked and swole way.

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273 work

Non-stop meeting day,
So it's great I got this out
While I had the chance.

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272 downstairs

TGIF, yo!
It's Friday, but that stands for
Thank God It's Flushing.

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271 downstairs

I know I didn't
Eat any sloppy joes but
Damn, sure seems like it.

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270 home

Just got a massage,
And my asshole got jealous
Of my relaxed parts.

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269 home

It's been a few days.
Normally that means I'm due
For three or four more.

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268 home

Another Friday,
And starting off with a dump.
That's how I do, do

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267 home

My back hurts a lot,
And it's taking all the fun
Out of messy shits.

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266 home

David Hasselhoff
Said, "This is a mess." I call
And raise you, good sir.


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265 downstairs

Chicken nuggets in
The toaster. Shitty nuggets
In the toilet bowl.

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264 downstairs

Back still hurts, which is
A downside of shitting more.
That, and all the shit.

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263 home

Almost shit my pants.
Was afraid to fart in case
It came with a friend.

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262 home

I think my stomach
Transformed overnight into
A witch's cauldron.

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261 home

My back is still out,
So shitting less often is
Appreciated.

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260 downstairs

I threw out my back,
So this is quite challenging.
Time to try wiping!

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259 downstairs

That one was brewing
For at least two days. Brewing
And fermenting too.

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258 downstairs

That's 8 in three days.
A few years ago, I had
9 in a whole month.

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257 downstairs

My girl has Covid,
Which sucks, but doesn't explain
My diarrhea.

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256 home

Was it the sausage?
Was it the chicken salad?
Either way, this blows.

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255 home

Three shits yesterday
And two already today.
Oh it's on, August.

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254 home

That's hilarious.
I got exercise minutes
On my watch for this.

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253 kids’ bathroom

That's shit number 3.
Number 3 of number 2
Makes me Number 1.

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252 kids’ bathroom

The poop emoji
Doesn't resemble my shit
(Except for the face).

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251 downstairs

Today is 8-3,
As in, "I 8-3 hot dogs
And now have the shits."

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250 downstairs

Behold, this is my
Sesquicentennial shit
(Plus one hundred more).

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249 work

New month, same old shit.
I'd say we need new shit but
I think it's en route.

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