205 kids’ bathroom

I muted my Zoom
To rip off some giant farts.
This shit was ready.

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204 kids’ bathroom

I'm not complaining,
But I'm surprised that it flushed.
Way to go, toilet.


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203 downstairs

My daughter's camping
So we only have one kid,
Not counting this one.

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202 work!

Starting the week off
With a bang. Well technically,
It's a grunt-squish-plop.

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201 downstairs

Should rain tomorrow,
Which is good, because my ass
Is too dry right now.

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200 kids’ bathroom

This pace is crazy.
The probiotics only
Get partial credit.

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199 downstairs

My third shit today!
It's starting to get spooky.
(Emphasis on POO)

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198 downstairs

If you take a shit
In holy water, does that
Make you assholy?

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197 downstairs

My butt wanted to
Take a breather, but it can't -
There's shit in the way.

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196 work!

In and out quickly
Before anyone saw me.
My name remains good.

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195 kids’ bathroom

Chipotle's brisket
Tasted good on the way in…
I'll leave it at that.

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194 work!

My first shit at work.
Not sure this is what they mean
By "go make your mark."


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193 home

I didn't shit on
Our weekend temple retreat.
And we say, "Amen."

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192 downstairs

The mighty river
Flows brown with the memories
Of Chipotles past.

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191 downstairs

I should be knighted
As Sir Dumpsalot after
This impressive run.

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190 kids’ bathroom

Those probiotics
Appear to work. If by "work"
I mean "shit a lot."

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189 home

Rock and plop. Repeat.
This tried and true formula
Delivered again.

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188 downstairs

Chicken and waffles:
A great pairing at first, but
They've separated.

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187 downstairs

1-8-7 is
The code for murder, and I
Murdered this toilet.

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186 downstairs

I feel like I'm a
Human-sized rabbit, because
Of my big-small shits.

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185 downstairs

This one hardly counts,
But shit coming from my ass
Merits a haiku.

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184 kids’ bathroom

My asshole sounds like
It's auditioning for an
Alka Seltzer ad.


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183 home

Was quick and easy,
And didn't need much cleanup.
No complaints. 5 stars.

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182 downstairs

Work email is down,
So I'm just sitting around.
Might as well shit, right?

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181 kids’ bathroom

My car's in the shop,
So I'm changing the fluids
Of my rectum too.

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