The shredded chicken
Looks to have remained shredded.
Let's remember that.
Sent from my iPhone
Thursday, February 27, 2020
Wednesday, February 26, 2020
31 home (kids’ bathroom)
My butt doesn't know
That I don't have Pilates,
So it does its thing.
Sent from my iPhone
That I don't have Pilates,
So it does its thing.
Sent from my iPhone
Monday, February 24, 2020
30 home (downstairs)
Staples Center food
Made me wish that my butt were
Somehow stapled shut.
Sent from my iPhone
Made me wish that my butt were
Somehow stapled shut.
Sent from my iPhone
Wednesday, February 19, 2020
29 home (downstairs)
Had to rush back home
For an emergency stop.
Cut it way too close.
Sent from my iPhone
For an emergency stop.
Cut it way too close.
Sent from my iPhone
Tuesday, February 18, 2020
28 home (downstairs)
Made pizza last night.
Now I'm making something else.
No oven this time.
Sent from my iPhone
Now I'm making something else.
No oven this time.
Sent from my iPhone
Sunday, February 16, 2020
27 home (downstairs)
Make up your mind, shit.
First you're all like, "Let me out!"
But now I'm pushing.
Sent from my iPhone
First you're all like, "Let me out!"
But now I'm pushing.
Sent from my iPhone
26 home
Friday
It's Valentine's Day!
So that explains why there's some
Red in the toilet.
Sent from my iPhone
It's Valentine's Day!
So that explains why there's some
Red in the toilet.
Sent from my iPhone
Wednesday, February 12, 2020
25 home (kids’ bathroom)
Pilates time soon!
Gotta get the lead out, and
By lead, I mean shit.
Sent from my iPhone
Gotta get the lead out, and
By lead, I mean shit.
Sent from my iPhone
Monday, February 10, 2020
24 home
Saw Cirque du Soleil.
Sure, it's impressive. But they
Can't get this stinky.
Sent from my iPhone
Sure, it's impressive. But they
Can't get this stinky.
Sent from my iPhone
23 home (kids’ bathroom)
Sunday
On the 7th day,
My ass rested. But the hole
Worked some overtime.
Sent from my iPhone
On the 7th day,
My ass rested. But the hole
Worked some overtime.
Sent from my iPhone
22 home (downstairs)
Friday
This was a classic
"Cork and bottle" dump session.
Solid, then liquid.
Sent from my iPhone
This was a classic
"Cork and bottle" dump session.
Solid, then liquid.
Sent from my iPhone
Wednesday, February 5, 2020
21 home (downstairs)
Pilates will hurt.
I'll be a few pounds lighter,
So at least there's that.
Sent from my iPhone
I'll be a few pounds lighter,
So at least there's that.
Sent from my iPhone
Sunday, February 2, 2020
20 home (downstairs)
Superbowl's today,
So I just changed my toilet
To a Pooperbowl.
Sent from my iPhone
So I just changed my toilet
To a Pooperbowl.
Sent from my iPhone
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