KK116

San Diego sports will never be the same, 

After what I flushed at the Padres game.

#226

Two logs were released off to sea.
Brown and thick like a soft tree.

Sent from my iPhone

Sept 29

That's some serious crap I'm crappin'.
How the crap did that crap happen?

Sent from my iPhone

#225

With the greatest of ease I began to unload.
I just had to shift into defecation mode.

Sent from my iPhone

KK115

​My room wasn't ready yet at the Hard Rock Hotel,

So I stunk up their lobby bathroom. (Please don't tell)

#224

Crapping in my west LA office.
Thank god for the outgoing orifice.

Sent from my iPhone

Sept 28

The barbecue was Korean,
And I don't like what I'm seein'.

Sent from my iPhone

Sept 26

Last night I watched Snoop Doggy Dogg,
Now the toilet has brown foggy fog.

Sent from my iPhone

KK114

Dressed causally at work for a slow, Friday pace.
But these tight jeans don't hold bowels in place.

Message from Paul Klein

You have a pending incoming docs shared with you via Google docs

Click to open: Secure Message

Google Docs makes it easy to create, store and share online documents, spreadsheets and presentations.

--

Rooftoppers, Inc.

Personal and Professional Integrity since 1983

#223

Friday Friday, must crap that day.
Friday Friday, felt it slip away.

Sent from my iPhone

#222

Round two was easy to complete.
Happened as my ass hit the seat.

Sent from my iPhone

#221

I've failed to report a couple of dumps.
This one today was nothing but lumps.


Sent from my iPhone

KK113

​The pressure in my gut was giving me grief.
But one big shit brought instant relief.

Sept 22

That breakfast burrito
Made this shit un-neato.

Sent from my iPhone

#220

To be honest and truth be told.
Seemed to much for the bowl to hold.

Sent from my iPhone

#219

I had to push and wasn't easy.
What came out made me queasy.

Sent from my iPhone

Sept 21

I'll tell ya what -
That hurt my butt.

Sent from my iPhone

KK112

I saw my oldest friend become a happy groom.
Then I slipped away to stink up his room.

#218

Counting plops, 2,3,4.
Hoping for a little more.

Sent from my iPhone

#217

Went to Mogo's and ate a bowl.
Made room inside from out my hole.


Sent from my iPhone

#216

Stomach pains while homeward bound.
The crap I took looked strangely round.


Sent from my iPhone

KK111

​My gut was full, so I loosened by belt.

My stomach is now emptied! (Well, that's how it felt)

 

 

#215

The moment I saw the beautifully lighted Palmdale sign,
I knew it would be a dumping ground for me, Paul Klein.

Sent from my iPhone

Sept 17

After Back to School Night,
Brown kids started a pool fight.

Sent from my iPhone

#214

Big, fast and clean.
I'm a crapping machine.

Sent from my iPhone

KK110

From an ROI perspective, I got my money's worth.
That one was long and brown with substantial girth.

#213

The New Year dinner for us Jews.
Led to headline big poop news.

Sent from my iPhone

#212

I had to push to start and go.
Corn was a part of the flow.


Sent from my iPhone

Sept 14

As mushy, messy feces falls,
I remember last night's matzo balls.

Sent from my iPhone

Sept 13

I ate too much for Rosh Hashanah;
I hope I have no shit mañana,


Sent from my iPhone

Sept 11

To honor the towers going down,
I said the Pledge while making brown.

Sent from my iPhone

#211

Don't know why I can't count any more.
Third shit today and hoping for four.

Sent from my iPhone

KK109

This morning I tried a new breakfast burrito. ​

Let's just say the ending wasn't neato.

#209

Amazed at the volume that left my ass.
Sprayed like hell to cover the smell of gas.

Sent from my iPhone

#209

Sometimes in the cool morning
The shit flows without warning.

Sent from my iPhone

#208

208 just wouldn't wait
It flew out of the starting gate.

Sent from my iPhone

KK108

In Palm Desert it's 102 degrees,
but I'm on the toilet, typing as I squeeze.

#207

Mixed up my numbers while on the road.
Back in town to drop a load.

Sent from my iPhone

Sept 7

Pebbles aren't my normal habit,
Today I'll go by Peter Rabbit.

Sent from my iPhone

# 204

Nice vacation in Utah's Park City.
Leaving a deposit that's quite shitty.

Sent from my iPhone

Sept 7

On Labor Day, I scream and push
As something exits from my tush.

Sent from my iPhone

Sept 4

The salad I had for lunch was chopped,
But it somehow congealed before I popped.

Sent from my iPhone

#204

Crapping at elevation
Gives me a sense of trepidation.

Sent from my iPhone

KK107

Sitting here shitting and trying to rhyme, 

But now I'm finished and ran out of time. 

#204

It was a sweet and sickening smell.
Thinking, when did I eat at Taco Bell?

Sent from my iPhone

Sept 2

The shit felt gross, but just one wipe
And all was clear. (You know the type.)

Sent from my iPhone

KK106

 

I felt lighter, happier, and increased mojo,
After a dump at my son's karate dojo.
   

Sept 1

I think I shat out Nessy.
I thought she'd be more messy.

Sent from my iPhone