136 downstairs

What the fuck is this?
I didn't eat anything
That should cause this…mess.

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135 downstairs

Can shit have a tail?
That looked like a brown lizard
Making its escape.

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134 home

I went from "Do I…?"
To "splat!" in like ten seconds.
Sound like fun? It's not.

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133 home

Eating that curry
Made me poop in a hurry.
Felt like a slurry.

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132 home

Both gross and painful.
How did I get so lucky?
Genetics I guess.

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131 home

They call it Thai food
But it just made my butt lose.
(That's better spoken.)

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130 downstairs

This wasn't a log,
Nor was it sawdust. I'd say
More like two branches.

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129 home

My second attempt
Was successful. Well, maybe
Not to the toilet.

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128 home

Oh good, there we go.
This was on deck for a bit.
Also in the hole.

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127 home

Shitting with bruised ribs
Might sound like fun, but it's not.
You fucking sicko.

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126 kids’ bathroom

My back hurts a lot,
So this shit made me nervous.
All's fine in the end.

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125 downstairs

Made my parents leave
So I could do this without
Harming my image.

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124 home

Yesterday

This one came on fast
And then I forgot to write.
I'm a silly man.

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123 kids’ bathroom

I must have missed one.
I'm usually on it, but
Something smells fishy.

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122 downstairs

Oh come on, stomach.
I think enough is enough.
My hole needs a break.

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121 kids’ bathroom

A 3-dump Monday,
With a chance I'll go for 4.
I'll keep you posted.

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120 kids’ bathroom

The kids are at school,
So I'm wrecking their bathroom
Like all good dads do.

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119 downstairs

I'm no scientist,
But I think that last night's farts
Were solidified.

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118 downstairs

That swordfish last night
Had the sword part removed, but
Tell that to my butt.

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117 home

A triple flusher
And an unhappy butthole.
Things are looking up!

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116 downstairs

After all these years
And all these stellar haiku,
I just keep shitting.

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115 home

TGIF? No.
I mean not if that stands for
Thank God It's Fragrant.

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114 downstairs

My leg fell asleep,
And my butt hurts. Just picture
How that makes me walk.

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113 home

We're back from the vet,
And neither Emmy nor I
Shit on the floor there.

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112 home

Two shits already
And I don't think I'm done yet.
Just so much to give!


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111 downstairs

Going for a walk,
But doing this first. I'm not
A shit-walking guy.

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110 kids’ room

Took my kids to school,
Then dropped these off at the pool.
I'm quite the chauffeur.

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109 downstairs

Booming farts last night,
So this was underwhelming
(But oversmelming).
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108 home

(Yesterday)

The shower can wait.
I have more pressing matters…
Inside my rectum.

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107 downstairs

Way to go, toilet.
I know that was a challenge,
But you persevered.

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106 downstairs

That made a weird sound.
I'd try to describe it, but
Fwatt is all I got.

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